Back to Work?
I have no idea what is going on. I’m having an identity crisis of the worst kind and I have so many thoughts and ideas and worries in my head that there is no way I would ever be able to voice them all. I hope that by writing it all out here, it will help me sort things out and give me a small sense of control.
I have to go back to work on August 18th, about 3 weeks. I have to be back on that day, my federally protected leave will be over and they can fire me and find someone else to replace me if I don’t go back. Here is my dilemma…
This last weekend was an amazing and transformative experience, it probably changed the way I look at birth forever!
First, I’ll start out by saying that I had Cambria the entire time. There were a few other moms there with babies as well and they were all wonderful! It must have been
boobs magic, because out of 5 babies, not a single one ever cried for more than a second during the entire 3 days. That made it really easy to concentrate on everything that was being taught!
I went into this only knowing that the role of a doula was emotional & physical labor support. I love to help people, I am a huge advocate of informed births, it is something that I have experience with (giving birth), and it’s a job that will be constantly changing. No two births will ever be the same. It sounded perfect!
It’s all about the woman. Everyone focuses on the baby throughout pregnancy and childbirth, but the role of a doula is solely to support the woman (& her partner, if there is one.) A lot of time your hear, “well your labor was (horrible, traumatic, ended in cesarean, long, painful etc.) but at least you have a healthy baby!” That’s not what it’s about, it’s about a healthy baby and a healthy and happy mother. It’s about her feelings and memories of the birth experience, no matter how she gives birth. A mother can choose to birth however she wants, and it’s my role as a doula to help her achieve that. Whether it’s a drug-free vaginal birth, a scheduled cesarean, cesarean because of a medical emergency, dilating to 4 cm and then requesting an epidural, or whatever other method she may choose. If she is informed, she always has a good reason for what she chooses.
Although I haven’t had a cesarean, I have had two completely different birth experiences. A vaginal birth with an epidural and a drug-free vaginal birth. Both had the same outcome (a healthy baby), but they left me with two radically different feelings about the birth. It all had to do with how I was treated during the birth. The information, care, and support you receive makes all the difference!
My goal as a doula will be to ensure that every woman that I assist will have a great birth experience and a positive memory of the birth, no matter how it happens.
Cambria - 7 weeks
- I really need to get better about posting these on Mondays…
- Cambria ended up with me in my doula training for the entire 3 days and she was wonderful! Just nursing, hanging out, and sleeping the entire time
- HUGE growth spurt this week. Somehow she went from barely fitting in 0-3 month clothes and now this onesie is size 3 months… and it’s not going to fit much longer at this rate!
- Her hair isn’t falling out like I thought it would. I’m hoping that she keeps it because then she will have the same hair color as me!
- I am her human pacifier. She spits out every single one that I give her, but she will immediately fall asleep sucking on my pinky finger
- I still haven’t started pumping yet, and I know that I really need to try to give her a bottle because that window is closing. There is really no other option once I go back to work.
- Cheeks & rolls. Nom nom nom!
Good morning, sunshines! :)
Three Positive Things
1.) Emberly pooped in the potty and we made our first trip out to Target and my parents’ house with no mishaps
2.) My doula training starts tomorrow and I’m really enjoying my current read (The Birth Partner)
3.) Richard is super dad, he will be watching a newborn and a potty training toddler tomorrow. He has to stay close enough to bring the baby in for feedings, but also entertain said toddler while keeping her close to a bathroom. We bought an Ergo for him to use instead of the wrap (for convenience) and there is a mall across the street. Luckily my mom can watch Emberly during the class on Saturday & Sunday, so he can just hang out with Cambria.
Emberly wanted in on the picture taking fun after her bath!
Cambria - 6 Weeks
- 6 weeks already (on Monday)! That means that my maternity leave is halfway over :(
- So.many.smiles. I love it!
- Meals are about every 2 hours during the day
- Cambria is still a pretty good sleeper. I know it won’t last, but it’s wonderful for now! Emberly and her wake up at approximately the same time in the middle of the night
- She loves bath time, being carried in the Boba wrap, getting her hair brushed, and grabbing hair